English degree personal statement example (1f) with review

Expert feedback from The Student Room personal statement reviewer

General Comments:

The applicant hasn't taken the opportunity to expand on their interest in their chosen degree course. Not a single writer or text is mentioned. They haven't expanded enough on their interest in language and theatre and show little evidence of critical engagement and wider reading. There is too much information about interests and hobbies in comparison. The personal statement needs to be more academically focused. The applicant also needs to remember to include full stops at the end of paragraphs.

Comments on the statement:

Ever since I have had the ability to understand it, I have been fascinated by the English language. As a child, I would either be writing, reading or telling stories and ever sine then, have read a wide variety of both fiction and non-fiction texts from a variety of genres and eras This is incredibly clichéd and won't impress academics, who want to know about your current interest and ability in English. Talk more about the things you've read. You haven't mentioned a single text or writer and therefore haven't demonstrated enough enthusiasm or commitment to wider reading.

This passion for language has led me to many different extra-curricular activities. For the past four years, I have attended a Youth Theatre each week where we concentrate very much on both improvised and scripted drama but also have done work on stage management, stage make-up, singing, and signed singing (an interest which begun with my learning of both violin and double bass to grade 4 standard) This is wasting valuable characters. You should always try to keep information about extra-currics relevant to your course. Theatre is an important part of English Literature but you haven't discussed any plays. Universities won't be interested in stage make-up etc.

With this same organisation, I have volunteered for the past three years at one of the children's groups where I work helping with drama, music and art. It was with this same organisation that I decided to learn Sign Language Full stop needed. You've missed them off the end of most paragraphs.

I have recently gained my British Sign Language Level 1 certificate and am now beginning a Level 2 course. I began learning Sign Language at the same time as starting my A-Level in English Language and Literature, a course I have found extremely interesting. Taking these two courses concurrently was very exciting for me as learning more about the linguistics of the English Language enabled me to make comparisons between the two languages Which comparisons did you make which you found interesting?

These interests have led me to this course which I not only feel suits my needs and interests aptly, but also excites me in its course content. This is fairly obvious, otherwise you wouldn't have applied for it. Although I've enjoyed all of my A-Level English Language and Literature course but have found a few parts of it particularly interesting. This sentence doesn't make sense. I specifically enjoyed our coursework tasks for our AS Level as it included writing a piece of original fiction, an aspect of English which I have always enjoyed. I also enjoyed the task of performing a monologue as I have missed not being able to study drama as a subject Is this is the best thing to write when applying for an English course which will probably include few or no opportunities to take part in drama? Universities will want to know that you are keen to remain focused on the academic study of language/literature.

I try to follow my interests outside of school and so attend a wide variety of theatre productions, art exhibitions, musical performances and subject related lectures. When studying psychology last year, I attended a large psychology conference with a variety of speakers which was both helpful and interesting. Last year I also attended an 'art master class' organised with Middlesex University and with nine other students, it gave more opportunity for more detailed and involved discussions. I have not yet had the opportunity to attend an English related lecture but look forward to a study day in March which will aid me with my study of Shakespeare's Antony and Cleopatra This is largely unrelated to your chosen university course. There is too much information about your hobbies and interests compared to your main academic focus (English).

Alongside this and my voluntary work with the drama organisation, I have worked in a variety of jobs which have all helped to develop my sense of responsibility as they were dependent on both teamwork and co-operation but also my use of initiative You haven't given any examples.

I have chosen to defer my entry to 2005 as I plan to complete a voluntary teaching placement in Africa. The prospect of this placement excites me as it will give me the opportunity to travel, to meet new people, to experience new cultures, and, above all, help out where much help is needed. I feel that taking a gap year is going to benefit me greatly as it will enable me to gain valuable life skills that will benefit me both at university but also in whatever I choose to do following university whether it be a postgraduate course or work.