Choosing the right housemates for second year of university
Nobody to live with in your second year? Can’t decide which friends would make the best housemates?
Choosing who to live with in second year can be a big ball of emotions - you don’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings, but you also don’t want to rush your decision and end up somewhere that makes you miserable.
We've got some practical advice to help you consider your options, no matter what stage of housemate hunting you're at.
But there are a few things you can do to make it easier:
Try to keep an open mind. If you get on just fine with that one person – and they’re tidy, respectful and reliable – it might be worth it if the situation ticks all the boxes (and you get to live with your best friends too). If you’re living in a large houseshare, what are the chances you'll actually spend much time alone with them?
The number one priority is that you’re comfortable. You’ll be paying rent like everyone else and it’s going to be your home too. Stand strong and don’t let others lead you into a living situation where you feel unsafe or unhappy. If they keep putting pressure on you, it might be a sign that you’re not compatible as housemates, or that this sort of thing could be a frequent occurrence if you live together.
Remember: at the end of the day, it's only for a year. With lectures, studying, part-time jobs, going out, placements, weekends at home and holidays, time will fly.
Start with who's currently in your halls. Hopefully you'll have a good idea of what they’re like to live with, and any bad habits are like water off a duck’s back by now.
If you haven’t quite clicked – or a year with them has been enough – look further afield instead.
Clubs and societies can be a good source of housemate potential, but they shouldn't be the only reason to live with someone. Use these as a starting point to get to know that person better - grab a drink after your next practice or turn the conversation away from that interest to get a feel for them.
Who can put up with your moody moments, obsessive nature or shocking sense of humour? Who are you so comfortable with that don't you have to 'try' if you're both tired? Often these make for the happiest houseshares.
And it goes without saying: don’t make any major decisions on a night out.
If you’re studying an intense subject like law or medicine, living with those who understand how stressful things can get might be a blessing (or at least guarantee you'll have peace and quiet when you need to study).
Whether it’s keeping the noise down during deadlines and exams, having someone to chat through essay ideas, trudge to 9am lectures with or simply motivate you to study when Netflix is calling, your perfect housemates might be beside you in your lecture.
Another thing to keep in mind is that the student housing market really can vary from one city to another, so you might have slightly more time to make arrangements depending on where you are.
As well as advising about on and off-campus accommodation, your university's housing office (or student services department) can keep you posted about upcoming events to connect you with those in a similar position - these could be housing fairs or fun ‘speed dating’ evenings to match potential housemates together.
They can also recommend local letting agents and landlords that have been verified by other students and meet certain standards.
Just because your university isn’t affiliated with them, doesn’t mean they’ll leave you high and dry if you run into problems or have questions. If an advert sounds too good to be true or you feel you’re being treated unfairly, ask your uni to take a look.
Don't feel like you're alone if this ends up being you. The number of students going through Clearing has grown each year, so the chances are there will be others in the same position.
Getting to know potential housemates online or viewing houses a few weeks before term begins may not be ideal, but it might be your only choice. In reality it’s no different to how things would work if you had a place in halls, as you would still be living with strangers - the only difference here is that you need to find a property together (which your university can help with).
Because everything goes through your university’s housing office, they’ll be well aware of who is in need of a place to live - they can match people up and support them in their search.
It might not be the conventional first-year student experience, but it's only for a year and you might even enjoy it more.
We've got some practical advice to help you consider your options, no matter what stage of housemate hunting you're at.
Jump straight to:
- I have someone in mind – how should I ask them?
- There’s someone I don’t want to live with – should I speak up?
- I don’t know who to live with – how should I choose?
- I have nobody to live with in second year – what should I do?
- I’m going into first year student without a place in halls – how do I find housemates?
I have someone in mind – how should I ask them?
Asking someone if they want to live with you is a vulnerable position to put yourself in, especially if you’re not sure what their plans are or if they feel the same way. Even if you've become close with friends, it can be an awkward conversation to bring up.But there are a few things you can do to make it easier:
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Don’t make a big thing of it: drop a few hints or ask them about their plans. If they haven't arranged anything yet, perhaps follow up in the next few days – you don’t want to put them on the spot and pressure them.
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Ask them via WhatsApp rather than in person: this can be easier than face-to-face, plus it gives them time to consider your offer – after all, it’s a big decision for them too.
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Try not to take things to heart: if someone turns you down, don’t take it as a reflection on you, personally. They may already have plans, plus everyone has their own preferences when it comes to living situations.
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Don’t wait around for ages: once you’ve asked, don’t be strung along waiting for an answer. Tell them when you need to know by, so you can make other plans if necessary.
- Read more: how to make friends at university (on The Student Room)
There’s someone I don’t want to live with – should I speak up?
If there’s a group of you, it's common to feel closer to some more than others. Another common scenario is where someone wants to bring in their fun friend, or a boyfriend/girlfriend you hardly know.Try to keep an open mind. If you get on just fine with that one person – and they’re tidy, respectful and reliable – it might be worth it if the situation ticks all the boxes (and you get to live with your best friends too). If you’re living in a large houseshare, what are the chances you'll actually spend much time alone with them?
Choosing who to live with is the hardest part and often changes along the way. I started early with a large group which soon got smaller as we realised we were all too different.
We started out as a group of eight, then half of them dropped out - by the time we found a house it wasn’t a very nice one. Avoid my mistake by finding second-year housing as soon as possible.
The number one priority is that you’re comfortable. You’ll be paying rent like everyone else and it’s going to be your home too. Stand strong and don’t let others lead you into a living situation where you feel unsafe or unhappy. If they keep putting pressure on you, it might be a sign that you’re not compatible as housemates, or that this sort of thing could be a frequent occurrence if you live together.
Remember: at the end of the day, it's only for a year. With lectures, studying, part-time jobs, going out, placements, weekends at home and holidays, time will fly.
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Read more: before you go to university
I don't know who to live with - how should I choose?
If you’re still looking for housemates, or haven’t thought about it yet, here's where to find potential options:Current flatmates
If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it!Start with who's currently in your halls. Hopefully you'll have a good idea of what they’re like to live with, and any bad habits are like water off a duck’s back by now.
If you haven’t quite clicked – or a year with them has been enough – look further afield instead.
Best friends, clubs and societies
Remember that you’re looking for someone to live with, not just hang out with. Being a laugh or liking the same bands won’t make up for leaving hair in the sink or not paying their share of bills - try and find someone who will be a responsible housemate.Clubs and societies can be a good source of housemate potential, but they shouldn't be the only reason to live with someone. Use these as a starting point to get to know that person better - grab a drink after your next practice or turn the conversation away from that interest to get a feel for them.
Who can put up with your moody moments, obsessive nature or shocking sense of humour? Who are you so comfortable with that don't you have to 'try' if you're both tired? Often these make for the happiest houseshares.
And it goes without saying: don’t make any major decisions on a night out.
Coursemates
You may notice that some subjects attract certain characters or personalities, which may (or may not) make for your perfect housemate.If you’re studying an intense subject like law or medicine, living with those who understand how stressful things can get might be a blessing (or at least guarantee you'll have peace and quiet when you need to study).
Whether it’s keeping the noise down during deadlines and exams, having someone to chat through essay ideas, trudge to 9am lectures with or simply motivate you to study when Netflix is calling, your perfect housemates might be beside you in your lecture.
- Read more: revision help and advice
I have nobody to live with in second year – what should I do?
Whether you’re on your own or on the hunt for an extra person or two, don’t suffer in silence. It might feel like you’re the only one who hasn’t got their housing for next year sorted, but you won’t be.Finding housemates was hard because I hadn't lived in a flat and a lot of people ended up living with their flatmates.
Another thing to keep in mind is that the student housing market really can vary from one city to another, so you might have slightly more time to make arrangements depending on where you are.
Talk to your university
As well as advising about on and off-campus accommodation, your university's housing office (or student services department) can keep you posted about upcoming events to connect you with those in a similar position - these could be housing fairs or fun ‘speed dating’ evenings to match potential housemates together.They can also recommend local letting agents and landlords that have been verified by other students and meet certain standards.
Broaden your search
Try local listings for your area such as SpareRoom and Gumtree. While these may not display houseshares for students exclusively, they often have an option to filter results (not that you couldn't live with a non-student if you wanted to).Just because your university isn’t affiliated with them, doesn’t mean they’ll leave you high and dry if you run into problems or have questions. If an advert sounds too good to be true or you feel you’re being treated unfairly, ask your uni to take a look.
Keep eyes and ears open
While you can check your university’s social media channels for updates or groups for those looking for housemates, the answer to your prayers may lie in the student newspaper, on a noticeboard in the student union or in a conversation at the next table over in the student bar.I’m going into first year without a place in halls – how do I find housemates?
While nearly all universities aim to house first-year students on campus, if you secure your place at the last minute (i.e. through Clearing), there may not be any places left in halls - you may have to find a place in a houseshare instead.Don't feel like you're alone if this ends up being you. The number of students going through Clearing has grown each year, so the chances are there will be others in the same position.
Getting to know potential housemates online or viewing houses a few weeks before term begins may not be ideal, but it might be your only choice. In reality it’s no different to how things would work if you had a place in halls, as you would still be living with strangers - the only difference here is that you need to find a property together (which your university can help with).
Because everything goes through your university’s housing office, they’ll be well aware of who is in need of a place to live - they can match people up and support them in their search.
I didn't want to be responsible for a whole house with new people I've never met in a city I've never lived in, so I opted to stay in a house where my landlady lived with her husband. There were another two students in the house, but my bills were included in the rent and if anything went wrong it would get fixed.
It might not be the conventional first-year student experience, but it's only for a year and you might even enjoy it more.
- Read more: preparing for university - tips and advice
